waking

devastation in my stomach
regret in my mouth
eyes open to find

I didn’t actually annihilate the universe
by fleeing to Bali to sleep with the shaman
who seduced me in my dream
realizing too late
the fatality of idiocy
of impulse
of id

my most treasured love shattered
a star exploded
bleeding light for centuries
nothing left where love once lived

night terror melds into daybreak relief

gravity pulls me down into bed
I wind around your broad back
slip into the quiet curve of your legs

you twist and open
to embrace the receding vapor of my sin
welcoming me home again
holding nothing against me and nothing back
as my limbs weave apologies and promises
restaking my claim
and renewing my vows

finding reprieve in the generous blessing
of your hands
and the faithful absolution
of your lips